Most students walk past room C209 during Wednesday lunch without a second glance; it feels so ordinary, like any other classroom: colorful posters, students working on homework and people shuffling in and out. For LGBTQ+ individuals like seniors Jillian Ju and Isabelle Kok, however, it is one of the only spaces they can express their queerness without restriction or pressure, support one another while navigating the social dynamics and be accepted in ways that some families can’t.

 

According to a 2024 survey by The Trevor Project on LGBTQ+ youth’s mental health, 49% of respondents have reportedly experienced bullying in the past year. Additionally, another report by the organization also found that 41% of Asian American and Pacific Islander LGBTQ+ youth are not out to their parents, significantly higher than the 29% in the overall sample. This highlights the unique challenges LGBTQ+ individuals at MVHS face.

 

Senior Jillian Ju’s experience of coming out reflects how many LGBTQ+ students find acceptance and support more easily from peers than family, where navigating the shift in identity is harder to notice and thus becomes more complex. 

 

                                                                                                          “In my sophomore year, I started using they/them pronouns. I started soft launching my                                                                                                                           identity with people, and I think with my friends, that was a pretty smooth process,” Ju said.                                                                                                                 “But for my parents, they see this progression of dressing more feminine or used to act a                                                                                                                       certain way. I think they definitely noticed that, and they definitely comment on it, but I                                                                                                                         don't think they associate it with this as a new identity.” 

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                                                                                                          Ju’s experience at home demonstrates how the concept of sexual orientation can be easily                                                                                                                   misunderstood and overlooked, even by the people closest to you. At MVHS, however,                                                                                                                               LGBTQ+-identifying individuals can find supportive clubs and friend groups, such as the                                                                                                                         Gender Sexuality Alliance (GSA). 

 

                                                                                                          “Every person deserves a place where they can feel welcome, accepted, and celebrated for                                                                                                                   who they are, no questions asked, no judgment. That's what I want to provide for every                                                                                                                           student at MVHS,” English teacher and GSA advisor Mark Carpenter said. “Because I know that                                                                                                               some of our LGBTQ+ students have a little more of a challenging time finding that place, I                                                                                                                         make sure that my classroom is always that place.” 

 

While the school provides a supportive environment, Ju believes that there are still many daily occasions where showing their identity can feel uncomfortable and unnatural. 

 

“I feel like not asking people’s pronouns reinforces the norm that what you see is who this person is, and they don't really get a say in that,” Ju said. “There can be some awkward moments with this teacher, never really asking, and now it's two months into the year, and I don't feel like I have the opportunity to correct them.” 

 

Ju’s struggle with having their pronouns recognized exemplifies how small actions can play an important role in a student's sense of belonging. Senior Isabelle Kok further explained how heteronormativity, in other words, the assumption that being straight is the default, is common on campus as well. 

 

“There is still a lot of heteronormativity and a lot of ingrained homophobia at MVHS,” Kok said.

“For example, when people say ignorant things like, ‘That's so gay,’ as a joke, or a lot of people        

move around assuming that everyone is heterosexual or that everyone has the pronouns that

they assume that they have.”

 

The everyday assumptions Kok observes point to the broader climate that directly shapes how

and where students feel comfortable expressing their identities, a situational tension that Ju

personally experiences on campus as well.

 

“There are a lot of good and supportive spaces for queer people at our school. That can be GSA,

that can be any other club or extracurricular, even just a group of friends,” Ju said. “But I feel

like sometimes, if you go beyond that, it's a struggle, because you will meet these people who

don't necessarily have the same understanding of queerness as you do, and you have to grapple

with whether it’s my responsibility to explain that to them and work through with them in this

process? Or is this just something that I don't want to expose myself to?”

 

Ju’s uncertainty about whether it’s their responsibility to explain their identity to others is something Kok also discussed, but from a different angle: Kok pushes back on the idea that queer identity needs to be “expressed.”

 

“You don't have to be loud about your identity for it to be valid,” Kok said. “You can be yourself, and you can be queer without having to make that your whole identity, and you can still present yourself as a normal person.”  

 

Kok’s ideas reflect the fundamental philosophy that there should be no expectation to perform your identity. Students may choose to share their LGBTQ+ identity with their parents or not, with their peers or not or to join the GSA club or not, but these things do not define their identities. 

 

“My personal philosophy has always been to not care too much about how people would respond to my identity,” Ju said. “At the end of the day, I can control how I want to present and how I want to show up, but I can't really control after that how people see me, how they think about me.”

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